Hello, dear and faithful readers. I had to think long and hard about a topic for today's post. As I was toting my purse around today, and feeling every heavy pound that it weighs, I was reminded of how I ended up with the purse that I currently carry.
You first need to understand this about me: I'm not one of those people who have a million purses (like my friend Jessica) and changes them out several times a week based on what I'm wearing. I'm more of the mindset that you should get a purse that goes with everything and you use it until it can be used no more. Now that I think about it, that hasn't always been true for me. Yes, I do tote a purse around until it has lost its usefulness, but as far as the going with everything....well....does my Spongebob purse and my Power Puff Girls purse count?
In my mind, the perfect purse for me exists, but I just haven't found it. It should have a shoulder strap, not one of those backpack type things. I'm afraid if I had a purse like that then someone could steal something out of it when I wasn't looking. And since the purse is on my back, I would never see it. So, it has to have a strap. It needs to be a single strap, not a double. I don't have time to fight with the straps when I'm putting it on my shoulder. The strap should be long enough to hit me somewhere close to my waist. I don't do the little,bitty purses that barely fit under your arm. To me, those purses look like someone is carrying a football during an important play-off game.
The purse itself should be made of leather. This is only because it is durable and won't crack on you. I hate it when a cute purse starts to crack on the handle. It always pinches you. Now if the purse has sequins, bangles, rhinestones, fringe, or other sparkly stuff, that's a bonus. In that case, if it's really tacky, it won't matter if the material is man-made. Things like that don't matter if you are making a fashion statement, no matter what you are trying to say.
The inside of the purse should be roomy. Multiple pockets are good, but not necessary. There should be a special place to put keys so that you can grab them quickly when you need them. The interior of the purse should be large enough for all my stuff. Sunglasses, makeup, wallet, basic toiletry items (floss, tweezers, eyedrops, allergy medicine..the list goes on and on), cell phone, tissues, hand sanitizer. There's so much I may end up needing. I pride myself in being the resident "MacGyver." If you need something, I've probably got it. Need dental floss? I got it. Need Motrin? I got it. Need a pair of scissors? mirror? lotion? I got it and so much more. I think back in the day there was a show called "Let's Make a Deal" they had a game where the host called out some random item like a hair pin and the first lady to produce it got money. I would so win a show like that.
So, I like large purses. This is obviously because I have a ton of stuff to carry. The problem with this is that the larger the purse, the more stuff I carry around. The more I carry, the heavier it gets. I've actually had to visit the chiropractor before because my spine was out of whack from carrying my heavy purse. I guess the upside to this would be that if I were to swing it at someone, I would have a good weapon.
Everytime I go to a department store, I always go by the purses to see if the fabled, perfect purse is there. I've found a few here and there that I can live with , but so far I've yet to encounter the perfect purse. In the meantime, I'll carry the moderately sized, brown leather number that I'm currently using and if you need to build something with toothpicks, cough drops, and dental floss, I'm your gal.
What an asshole.
1 day ago